Thursday, February 18, 2010

Mixed results

Today I felt the death of winter. The streets overruneth with melted snow (water) and my ears didn't get cold. Sure as shootin', these are signs of spring. Just like old folks can predict the weather based on which parts of their body swells or jingles or falls off.

Yesterday, I almost died. Death by pizza cutter. Pathetic.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Regret

You shouldn't have eaten at Panda Express.

-stomach.